Does someone have to experience what you did to help?

There's an interesting exploration of this question in the New York Times. I see it as resistance, and a kind of question of trust. Can you care for me even though you are not going through what I'm going through. I think the question should be can you listen to me, and support me as I explore this? Similar experience can actually be confusing at times. But it's good to address the topic, and I like the way she did it.